You hear it in the news all the time, and you figured that mannn this world is going down the crapper. People getting stabbed and bashed everyday n crap, and I mean it feels distant from us until you see these things with your own two eyes first hand. I mean about 2 or 3 weeks ago I was driving home from uni at night, and I was driving along Hawken drive, and I suddenly noticed that on the sidepath was some guy getting ganged up on by 3 other guys... First thought to pass through my mind was... "Crap, should I help him?"... but I realised that I was but one man, I would not be prepared to fight off 3 other guys, sure I do martial arts, but I ain't no Bruce Lee right, and it's not like I had a weapon handy to bash some skulls in either. So I didn't get off and help him. On the other hand I should have called the cops as well. But I don't understand why I didn't, in fact I guess I was kind of afraid to stop... It was the kind of "What if they came after me?" or some lame silly excuse that comes up when your in unexpected situations like this. In hindsight I wish I was a little braver and at least called the cops... Perhaps getting out to fight them off would have been a silly idea... And pulling a baton or a non-lacerating weapon (blunt) and smacking them probably would get me in trouble as well afterwards. But I dunno ay... It's days like these that makes me train extra hard at kung fu, to ensure things like these don't happen to me or my friends... But yeah... this world is pretty screwed up... But I wonder... for a christian right... in that situation should I just simply resort to violence to (assuming I can) incapacitate the 3 guys ganging up on the other guy? I mean, in this case I would be fighting fire with fire right? I could've like hung around and helped the guy after he got beaten... which is pathetic and sad and just dude wth... or I could go in and Chuck Norris their asses... In the end people are gonna get hurt so would it be so wrong for me to be the one dishing out the pain? It's not like I hate them, I'm just stopping them from hurting the other guy right? by beating the living crap out of them. I mean the bible is probably one of the most violent books you'll ever have the good fortune to read. So I mean... doesn't that mean violence can be done for good? I mean forgiveness is something you do after something has happened... but isn't prevention the best cure? If you can prevent something from happening then why wait until after the damage is done and forgive?
My interpretation is that everything comes down to intentions. I mean the army had chaplains and they have their services and what not... You have christian soldiers on the frontline killing other people... You have christian police officers resorting to lethal force... But what are you doing it for? For me, as long as you are doing it out of "love" so to speak... ie. out of care or concern. I mean whether my actions are justified in the eyes of the law is one thing, but if I did intervene that fight and did "win" I would have been doing so because I was concerned about the situation and what would happen to the other guy... It's not like I'm doing this out of "evil" desires, I'm not there to mug anyone, or to exact revenge or to do anything apart from wanting to help the person in danger so to speak.
But that's all talk anyways, all talk and no walk. I didn't end up doing anything at all. And that makes me just as useless. The good I wanted to do I could not do. By standing on the side and turning a blind eye, I might as well have been the person beating the guy up in the first place. So I'm just as pitiful as they are. This whole ordeal just makes me a bit guilty and a bit tight in the chest... A bit disappointed in my own lack of courage... and sense of justice and urgency... It makes me angry that I was too chicken to get out and help, not necessarily to fight but to even call the police... It frustrates me every time those 10 seconds of the night resurface in my head...
I remember recounting it to some friends and even to my mum... and they all responded with "Did you help him? Did you at least call the police? Why didn't you help him?" etc... Like being poked in the side by a red hot iron rod... Makes me want to turn back time, get out of the car, and just roundhouse kick them in the face...
Neways... I need to sleep... Just had to rant a little to get this off my chest... It is a pity that violence or threats of violence are the only things capable of preventing more violence... Such is the state of the world...
Showing posts with label Fear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fear. Show all posts
Friday, June 26, 2009
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Pleasing People...
Today at work I was given a private class at 12:00... It was of a kid, whom unbeknown to me, had had an accident with large bodies of water before and was pretty much petrified of the pool. I simply assumed he was the typical freaked out kid and simply analysed what he knew and just used one of my regular programs (each instructor is slightly different in how they teach the same skills and different approaches) for a child of his ability. At the level he was at, all we teach is pretty much kicking on their stomach and on their backs and learn how to paddle... But he didn't have goggles for one, and was petrified to go on his back...
One thing I hate about private classes is that parents are watching even closely as the only kids in the class are theirs and they pay like 4 times the price for the same half hour so they make sure they get their "money's worth" and they try to tell you how you should run the friggin class when they have no darn clue what is involved with swimming. And so rather than being bent around the will of the child and not do what he's afraid to do, I try to ease them into the exercises slowly and gently so they aren't as scared... emphasis on the AS, since learning means changing, and as we know, humans don't generally like change and the unfamiliar can be scary. But in swimming sometimes certain skills cannot be... reduced or simplified or stepped down any further for the beginner, such is to kick on your back... you're either on your back or you aren't... And some kids don't like the feeling of facing the roof in an unfamiliar medium not knowing whether he's floating or sinking or where the ground is or where the teacher is or where his parents are or other random crap (although if you were sinking its quite obvious lol...). And so swimming on your back is probably a relatively big step particularly for this little kid that I had today. He had a pool noodle under his back and around his waist and he was holding on to it and he is meant to lie down on it so he's floating on his back on top of the noodle while I held on to him to stabilise and support him cos face it, without certain skills, even a noodle can't hold him up completely (that's why it says "use under competent supervision" on the noodle). But that kid was kind of freaking out a little, making weird whinging noises, telling him that everything is going to be fine and told him that it is easy if he's just tries it (because everything will be ok, and it is actually incredibly easy (remember that video about the limbless guy, he swam on his back! because its easier than on your stomach)if you just brave it and give it a go.)
I was trying to get him to simply put his legs out straight and get his back straight so he can float... and although he would have whinged he would be able to get used to it and realise its not so hard to float on your back with a floatation device. But the dad interrupts me and starts telling me how I should run my lesson, telling me how I should let him swim on his stomach more first to build up confidence... But the thing is, he didn't even bothered giving his kid some goggles and unless you put your head into the water, you cannot swim by yourself sustainably unless you are remarkably strong (relative to a child's strength). There are some reason's for this, any gymnast, diver, decent swimmer and decent athlete would be able to tell you that the movement of your head determines where your body goes. When you play ball games and you try to evade someone, the first part of your body that moves is your head, then your torso and then your legs. Only cartoon characters can run with their feet in front of their body fast. Your head has to be first. Gymnasts when they do flips and stuff, their heads determine their direction and most of their success, no head movement = painful stacks. Divers will tell you the same as gymnasts. And the same goes for swimming, if you swim with your head up, your feet will naturally sink to the bottom, and unless you have powerful legs, you won't be able to swim with your head up for very far before sinking to the bottom. Without goggles most children refuse to put their face in, and so there was no point for me to teach that kid to swim forwards cos we wouldn't get anywhere and he wouldn't learn anything. So swimming backwards was a good option to teach him something without goggles, and the dad goes and interrupts me and makes me change what I was doing. I wasn't about to rip back at him, so I just changed it and wasted the rest of his $45 bucks on activities his child would not benefit any more from.
The father initially told me why he chose private classes over regular group classes was because his kid didn't seem to be progressing and he wanted him to learn QUICKLY because he was going into primary school next year (which means swimming carnivals). Now, unless you're really keen on learning, you CANNOT learn things quick. Quick learning means quick change, which means BIG steps. And his kid was not about to be able to take big steps. And so when I tried to satisfy the father's desire to get the kid to improve quickly, the kid will naturally be scared, which is reasonable, and my job was to help him get over that initial fear and get him to try the things that would get him improving. But, the father contradicts himself when he sees his kid getting a little uncomfortable with getting on his back and yaps at me. Which is ironic and stupid. I wasn't about to let a 30 min private lesson go to waste and was gonna get that kid moving along quickly as requested.
So I guess you can't please everyone, sometimes you can't please anyone, and sometimes you can't actually please someone. When I finished the lesson, I knew the father wasn't too happy about the lesson, and I saw him debating with my supervisor about the lesson, I would have butted in and explained why I thought it was necessary to progress quickly. But I thought I'd keep my mouth shut and not guilt trip the guy and make him look like an idiot with his inability to comprehend his own desires for his child's rapid progress.
One thing I hate about private classes is that parents are watching even closely as the only kids in the class are theirs and they pay like 4 times the price for the same half hour so they make sure they get their "money's worth" and they try to tell you how you should run the friggin class when they have no darn clue what is involved with swimming. And so rather than being bent around the will of the child and not do what he's afraid to do, I try to ease them into the exercises slowly and gently so they aren't as scared... emphasis on the AS, since learning means changing, and as we know, humans don't generally like change and the unfamiliar can be scary. But in swimming sometimes certain skills cannot be... reduced or simplified or stepped down any further for the beginner, such is to kick on your back... you're either on your back or you aren't... And some kids don't like the feeling of facing the roof in an unfamiliar medium not knowing whether he's floating or sinking or where the ground is or where the teacher is or where his parents are or other random crap (although if you were sinking its quite obvious lol...). And so swimming on your back is probably a relatively big step particularly for this little kid that I had today. He had a pool noodle under his back and around his waist and he was holding on to it and he is meant to lie down on it so he's floating on his back on top of the noodle while I held on to him to stabilise and support him cos face it, without certain skills, even a noodle can't hold him up completely (that's why it says "use under competent supervision" on the noodle). But that kid was kind of freaking out a little, making weird whinging noises, telling him that everything is going to be fine and told him that it is easy if he's just tries it (because everything will be ok, and it is actually incredibly easy (remember that video about the limbless guy, he swam on his back! because its easier than on your stomach)if you just brave it and give it a go.)
I was trying to get him to simply put his legs out straight and get his back straight so he can float... and although he would have whinged he would be able to get used to it and realise its not so hard to float on your back with a floatation device. But the dad interrupts me and starts telling me how I should run my lesson, telling me how I should let him swim on his stomach more first to build up confidence... But the thing is, he didn't even bothered giving his kid some goggles and unless you put your head into the water, you cannot swim by yourself sustainably unless you are remarkably strong (relative to a child's strength). There are some reason's for this, any gymnast, diver, decent swimmer and decent athlete would be able to tell you that the movement of your head determines where your body goes. When you play ball games and you try to evade someone, the first part of your body that moves is your head, then your torso and then your legs. Only cartoon characters can run with their feet in front of their body fast. Your head has to be first. Gymnasts when they do flips and stuff, their heads determine their direction and most of their success, no head movement = painful stacks. Divers will tell you the same as gymnasts. And the same goes for swimming, if you swim with your head up, your feet will naturally sink to the bottom, and unless you have powerful legs, you won't be able to swim with your head up for very far before sinking to the bottom. Without goggles most children refuse to put their face in, and so there was no point for me to teach that kid to swim forwards cos we wouldn't get anywhere and he wouldn't learn anything. So swimming backwards was a good option to teach him something without goggles, and the dad goes and interrupts me and makes me change what I was doing. I wasn't about to rip back at him, so I just changed it and wasted the rest of his $45 bucks on activities his child would not benefit any more from.
The father initially told me why he chose private classes over regular group classes was because his kid didn't seem to be progressing and he wanted him to learn QUICKLY because he was going into primary school next year (which means swimming carnivals). Now, unless you're really keen on learning, you CANNOT learn things quick. Quick learning means quick change, which means BIG steps. And his kid was not about to be able to take big steps. And so when I tried to satisfy the father's desire to get the kid to improve quickly, the kid will naturally be scared, which is reasonable, and my job was to help him get over that initial fear and get him to try the things that would get him improving. But, the father contradicts himself when he sees his kid getting a little uncomfortable with getting on his back and yaps at me. Which is ironic and stupid. I wasn't about to let a 30 min private lesson go to waste and was gonna get that kid moving along quickly as requested.
So I guess you can't please everyone, sometimes you can't please anyone, and sometimes you can't actually please someone. When I finished the lesson, I knew the father wasn't too happy about the lesson, and I saw him debating with my supervisor about the lesson, I would have butted in and explained why I thought it was necessary to progress quickly. But I thought I'd keep my mouth shut and not guilt trip the guy and make him look like an idiot with his inability to comprehend his own desires for his child's rapid progress.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Re:Fear
If water is a strange medium and you are scared of it because you are uncertain about what will become of you when you enter it. Then the future is also equally strange and uncertain and we are equally afraid if not more afraid of what will become of us when the time comes. Every day of our lives have be preordained, God knows exactly how much suffering will come upon you in your life and will not give you more than you cannot handle, always providing a way out of trouble.
Having said that, some might ask "but what of the people who commit suicide?"... well, more often than not, especially when things are uber tough, the way out and the only way out is to trust God's guidance and depend on his strength that he willingly supplies in overflowing amounts should we choose to take it. I can't really say that suicide is trusting and depending on God to do his work and so we fall when we don't trust Him. In the past I could have been categorised as that kind of person, things got tough and I tried to stand on my own legs and struggled... So to speak, a year ago, my legs would then get broken until I realised I couldn't stand anymore on my own, looking elsewhere I came back to God to pick me up and used his strength to stand stronger than I could have ever stood apart from Him.
Having said that, some might ask "but what of the people who commit suicide?"... well, more often than not, especially when things are uber tough, the way out and the only way out is to trust God's guidance and depend on his strength that he willingly supplies in overflowing amounts should we choose to take it. I can't really say that suicide is trusting and depending on God to do his work and so we fall when we don't trust Him. In the past I could have been categorised as that kind of person, things got tough and I tried to stand on my own legs and struggled... So to speak, a year ago, my legs would then get broken until I realised I couldn't stand anymore on my own, looking elsewhere I came back to God to pick me up and used his strength to stand stronger than I could have ever stood apart from Him.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Fear
Well... some people may know that I work as a swimming instructor, particularly for Learn-to-Swim... and so I deal with lots of kids, young and old, and there is one thing that really gets you thinking... and that is fear... Some kids are petrified of the water to an irrational level... and they will make your eardrums bleed and quite literally temporarily deafen you for a minute or two if they go off close enough to your ear... some kids are so scared that they stiffen up like a rock and whatever potential that they had to swim would be lost as they would just sink to the bottom and then get even more scared... some older kids that are just learning how to swim will keep saying... "I can't, I can't, I can't do it"... even on the simplest of techniques... like simply relaxing and lying on your back in the water and kicking...
What is interesting is that it the reason for that kind of behaviour is because of some kind of precieved outcome that they think will happen if they enter the water or if they attempt a particular technique... but the thing is that if they trusted the fact that the instructor would not get them to do something that they couldn't do without providing all the necessary assistance required, then they would all be able to learn to swim easily and extremely quickly. But to trust someone also means putting faith in their promises for action. Trusting that when the instructor says "I will catch you", that he will indeed catch you when you push off and swim out to him. The fear creates a sort of stubbornness that is in my opinion unequalled in anyway. A 10 year old boy today was in a class that I was taking and the other kids were several years younger... the other 2 children must've been about 6-7ish? and the other children when I said "OK, we are gonna go kicking on our back." and one of the kids would not even need to wait for my hand to be placed on their back before pushing off towards me. However the 10 year old kid would be telling me "I can't do it, I can't do it"... and even when I'm basically carrying him in the water on his back, he would still be as stiff as a rock and could not even let go of my arm to hold onto a kickboard with both hands just because I said I needed both hands on his back to hold him up (I had one hand on his back, one hand on his chest and his head was on my shoulder). But I knew that he could have done it, because every human being is capable of swimming, and swimming is incredibly easy... One time at school, some inspirational media people came in and showed us a video, and a section of the video was about a guy born with no limbs and only had one foot which was attached to his hip and it had 3 toes... and that guy COULD SWIM BY HIMSELF... now if someone with no arms and no legs could swim by himself... I'm pretty sure any able minded human can swim... The reason why that guy with no limbs could swim was because he believed he could do it... and trusted whoever taught him how to swim enough to actually give it a shot without holding back.
As a christian, I think that this very situation also applies in all of our lives as well. Life isn't a walk in the park, and we all have times when we think that we can't make it or there isn't a way to do something. But if we just trust that God knows what he is doing and that if we believe in him and give it everything we have then we will get through those troubled times and we will learn and grow so much. I'm sure my students do not know how the various exercise will actually result in them learning how to swim, as they always say, "but I want to do this" or "But I can do that already" or "but I'm not good at that". They don't understand that it is not about the drills but about the outcome that the drills produce and they don't understand the 'plan' that we use to create the final outcome, which is when they can swim properly. Likewise, we will probably not understand the processes and the ways that God will use to bring out the things that he has planted in us. And we also don't always understand why certain things happen to us but if we just trust that God knows what he's doing and that we are in more than good hands then we can deal with those bad times with confidence.
All in a day's work
What is interesting is that it the reason for that kind of behaviour is because of some kind of precieved outcome that they think will happen if they enter the water or if they attempt a particular technique... but the thing is that if they trusted the fact that the instructor would not get them to do something that they couldn't do without providing all the necessary assistance required, then they would all be able to learn to swim easily and extremely quickly. But to trust someone also means putting faith in their promises for action. Trusting that when the instructor says "I will catch you", that he will indeed catch you when you push off and swim out to him. The fear creates a sort of stubbornness that is in my opinion unequalled in anyway. A 10 year old boy today was in a class that I was taking and the other kids were several years younger... the other 2 children must've been about 6-7ish? and the other children when I said "OK, we are gonna go kicking on our back." and one of the kids would not even need to wait for my hand to be placed on their back before pushing off towards me. However the 10 year old kid would be telling me "I can't do it, I can't do it"... and even when I'm basically carrying him in the water on his back, he would still be as stiff as a rock and could not even let go of my arm to hold onto a kickboard with both hands just because I said I needed both hands on his back to hold him up (I had one hand on his back, one hand on his chest and his head was on my shoulder). But I knew that he could have done it, because every human being is capable of swimming, and swimming is incredibly easy... One time at school, some inspirational media people came in and showed us a video, and a section of the video was about a guy born with no limbs and only had one foot which was attached to his hip and it had 3 toes... and that guy COULD SWIM BY HIMSELF... now if someone with no arms and no legs could swim by himself... I'm pretty sure any able minded human can swim... The reason why that guy with no limbs could swim was because he believed he could do it... and trusted whoever taught him how to swim enough to actually give it a shot without holding back.
As a christian, I think that this very situation also applies in all of our lives as well. Life isn't a walk in the park, and we all have times when we think that we can't make it or there isn't a way to do something. But if we just trust that God knows what he is doing and that if we believe in him and give it everything we have then we will get through those troubled times and we will learn and grow so much. I'm sure my students do not know how the various exercise will actually result in them learning how to swim, as they always say, "but I want to do this" or "But I can do that already" or "but I'm not good at that". They don't understand that it is not about the drills but about the outcome that the drills produce and they don't understand the 'plan' that we use to create the final outcome, which is when they can swim properly. Likewise, we will probably not understand the processes and the ways that God will use to bring out the things that he has planted in us. And we also don't always understand why certain things happen to us but if we just trust that God knows what he's doing and that we are in more than good hands then we can deal with those bad times with confidence.
All in a day's work
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